Be impervious.

posted in: mother, podcast | 8

Organize your attitude #18

Our attitude is the most important factor in how we handle life, and it is a multi-faceted component.

One of the components of an organized attitude – and one we don’t consider often – is imperviousness.

#080: Be an impervious mother.

The dictionary defines the adjective impervious as

  • not allowing liquid to flow through
  • unable to be affected by

This is not being unemotional, although at times it may appear so. It is, however, not letting circumstances or irritants dictate your emotions.

Part of an organized attitude is being impervious - not letting others or circumstances dictate your emotions and responses. Be impervious and set the tone.

It is only if you are impervious – if those liquids of outer happenings and other’s behaviors don’t flow through to your nerves – that you can control and manage your own emotions and responses.

So how do we build our own imperviousness?

Here are some strategies I have used:

  • Chant it as a mantra-motto when you find your irritation rising: Be impervious, be impervious.
  • Fake it until you make it. Pretend you’re impervious. Respond as if you are. Slowly, you’ll have trained your habitual reactions and you’ll find you are actually impervious.
  • Start and end the day with alone time – even just 5-10 minutes – and fit in a couple minutes here and there throughout your day. Don’t squander down time with aimless meandering around the house or online – close your eyes and breath, read a good book, walk outside and clear your head. Remove yourself from the madhouse regularly so you don’t become one of the madmen.
  • Pray continually. Instead of a single morning prayer to get you through the day, build the habit of praying for grace to honor God in how you respond – a quick, desperate, “forgive me, Lord; help me, Lord” prayer – when you feel your irritation rising.
  • Remember there’s always a way of escape. Others do not control your responses. We are commanded to love and irritation and resentment are not love. They are sinful responses. God forgives and He gives us the grace to choose to obey, but we need to turn to Him for that grace and forgiveness, as soon as we can, as often as we can.

Part of an organized attitude is being impervious - not letting others or circumstances dictate your emotions and responses. Be impervious and set the tone.

To be impervious is not to be stoic. Rather, it is how we become the thermostat rather than the thermometer, how we set the tone for ourselves and for our interactions.

Be impervious.

8 Responses

  1. Alison
    | Reply

    Mystie’s, this is the best one yet!
    I love the remainder to not squander your down time. How many times have I intended to sit down for 15min and work on one of my knitting projects or read ahead of my high schooler, but instead I have frittered away my time online ?
    thank you!
    Alison

  2. Valerie
    | Reply

    This is good stuff. At my husband’s work, they say, “He’s like a duck,” about a gentlemen that is un-rile-up-able. “Like a duck.” Impervious. Maybe I’ll chant “quack” softly next time I feel I’m getting riled up. :) Thanks for the encouragement in an area I need it, Mystie!

  3. Alison
    | Reply

    Similar to Elizabeth Gilbert’s advice for a mantra: I will not harbor negative thoughts. Mantras seem silly at first, but I have been able to move past the emotional response a time or two.

  4. […] of this one single thing and having to find it themselves if they misplaced it. I did a lot of impervious holding-of-the-line – which included nobody being allowed to use someone else’s pencil. We’ll keep at […]

  5. Beulah
    | Reply

    Much needed post for me today. My first kid always needs my assistance in studies. If I teach her something and ask her to read it and get back to me with questions, she will follow me until I go and sit with her. I should be impervious other than getting frustuated and angry.

  6. Leisa
    | Reply

    This is fantastic. You always seem to get it just right. I have been working hard to maintain any semblance of calm during times when my son is trying my patience. Now I have a mantra to chant in my head during those times, “be impervious.”
    I especially loved the last section:
    “Rather, it is how we become the thermostat rather than the thermometer, how we set the tone for ourselves and for our interactions.”
    My kids and myself need me to take this to heart and embrace it.

  7. […] to something. It takes time to adjust everyone to a new rhythm – that’s totally normal. Be impervious and don’t let their whining dictate your […]

  8. […] Pick up your shield of imperviousness, homeschool mama; these complaints are not about you. They are not even about what you are studying. […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *